Continuation of Part 1…
Written on the evening of Thursday, 12 March 2015
After lugging all our stuff, my husband decided that Mama should come over and spend the night with me. I myself could not envision going through labour alone, and though I was sad that my designated birth companion (my husband), the one who has been attending birth classes with me, who knows all the right words to say, couldn’t be there until morning, I was still thankful.
But the time between my husband leaving to fetch my mum and coming back (which was about an hour) was honestly one of the worst experiences of my life. My surges’ intensity took such a turn to the point where both my thighs felt the “zaps” every time; my legs trembled like crazy. At the time I was not aware that surges may be felt in the thighs. Only later on, reading articles, did I find out that that can be the case:
“…may be characterized by pains in your abdomen or lower back (or both) and may be accompanied by pain in the upper thighs.”
I don’t know how to describe surges other than, you can tell that it’s coming, it’s like a tightening all around your abdomen (unlike period cramps which you can usually pinpoint to a certain area and massaging it or curling into certain positions tends to ease the discomfort). Being alone left me with the most negative thoughts possible. Lying on the bed trying to massage my thighs while remembering to breathe correctly and keep good thoughts was a true struggle. I don’t remember whether I started to vocally cry out with each surge at this point, but I certainly did that a lot towards morning and still feel guilty at disturbing my wardmates’ peace and quiet. (Though I still did hear them snore sometimes.)
Mama was such a champ throughout. The massages were epic, and she kept repeating reassuring phrases to me, “Mama sayang Nchah,” “Sikit je lagi, ni semua nak bagi baby keluar,” “Breathing, breathing”. She did not sleep a wink. I think I managed some form of short naps, though mostly I did keep my eyes shut as much as possible anyway throughout both labour and delivery.
I was not aware of the time, but remember it being time for Subuh prayer, and letting my mum pray first. My husband came back at some point earlier (he spent the night in the hospital’s surau downstairs) and again I felt so grateful. I managed to take wudhu’ at the toilet and pray while lying down on the bed, but not before vomitting on myself right after drinking a cup of warm water. I have been feeling wind and burping urges all night but they did not come out. I hardly ate anyway other than one date and plain water. Throwing up made me feel better though.
(Wanted to also mention this: more of the mucus plug was discharged throughout labour, so toilet experiences were already such a sight. )
I think we called the nurses before Subuh as my surges were getting unbearable (though still not very frequent — they said to inform them if it gets to five surges per ten minutes, but my mum still counted about two surges per ten minutes). I cannot remember the details of events, but there was another VE, and I was four cm dilated, and they said they would bring me into the labour room after 7am. I was in a wheelchair again, though this time in a green hospital gown, head haphazardly covered in a towel and my mind already in a “separuh akal” state, not caring or noticing anything around.